The Levels of Self-Improvement: Why Growth Happens in Stages
There’s a concept I can’t seem to shake, and it’s that growth and a person's self-improvement journey are very much determined by stages.
Similar to video game levels, by which, once you’ve completed one, you unlock and move up to the next. With each level being slightly harder and taking slightly longer to complete.
Where they differ, however, is in the subjectivity. Your stages may look completely different to mine, with varying difficulty and differing domains.
I’m not necessarily talking about levels that you might see in running or the gym. You start with lifting 10kg, then 12kg, then 14, and so on.
These are obvious, numerical, and you’re not only able to see what level is next, but you’re also able to conceptualise the level you’re aiming for. You might start by running 1 mile to eventually complete the 26, for example.
The kind of stages and levels that I’m talking about are much more subtle, personal, and have a much bigger impact on your life.
The Example
I’d like to give an in-depth example of the kind of levelling up I’m talking about, to make as much sense as I possibly can.
You’ve decided to make a change, you don’t like your life and who you are, and know deep down there’s more to you than what you’re currently letting manifest. So you finally decided enough is enough, and you’re going to change, with an emphasis on health and fitness.
You’re now eating roughly 2 chocolate bars a week, you've started consciously thinking about the amount of protein that’s in your diet, you only vape on Saturday nights when drinking, you’re going to the gym 3 days a week, and you’ve started writing a journal.
This, compared to what you were doing before, is a major improvement, enough to make you feel as though you’ve figured it out. These improvements have allowed you to improve in various ways, and you’re noticing some non-negligible changes.
Roughly 2 years later, though, and you haven’t bought or eaten chocolate in months, in fact, you eat almost 0 refined sugars. You’re not only eating more than enough protein, but you also eat almost all whole foods and no longer have to think about your diet. You haven’t vaped in years. You accidentally do Dry January and only realise mid-way through February, and rarely drink more than once every couple of months. You’ve just completed 10 sessions in a week, 6 being weight lifting and 4 cardio sessions. You’ve written a blog once a week for over 2 years and are a few chapters into writing a book.
As you’ve probably guessed, this isn’t exactly a very hypothetical example.
But do you think I woke up one day and went from the former to the latter? Absolutely not. If I had tried to, I would’ve failed, and probably never tried again.
The shift also didn’t happen as gradually as you might think, either. It quite literally happened through stages.
I would level up, recognise the improvement, sustain it for a while until eventually levelling up again.
I don’t give this personal example to brag, it’s to showcase that no matter where you are or what you do, eventually, you’ll be able to do more. I do not doubt that in another couple of years, I’ll be looking back on today thinking the same thing.
Why The Stages Exist
This isn’t about diet, exercise, writing or even about your lifestyle. It’s about you, and how much you can handle. It’s about your competence, your work rate, and your capacity to handle more.
You need to learn and experience each level to unlock the next, skipping levels isn't an option. Each level increases your capacity, and with an increased capacity, you become ready for the next challenge.
Think of watching a TV show, you’ve heard your friends talking about it and how good season 3 is, so you decide to give it a go. But do you start on season 3?
No, you start on season 1, episode 1. You do this because you understand that season 3 wouldn’t make sense if you were to start there, but more importantly, you understand that the only reason season 3 is so good is because of what you watched, learned and experienced in the previous seasons.
Your growth stages work the same way.
You literally have to be on whatever level you’re currently at right now, for the next level to make any sense at all.
You do not choose the levels, nor are they chosen for you, you earn the right to unlock them.
I have only just reached the next stage, meaning it’ll be a while before I’m ready to go any further. And although I can identify specific aspects of what the next levels may include, I’ll never be able to fully grasp what the next level looks like, or when I’m ready to unlock it.
They simply happen naturally, as a consequence of the work you put in.
This is why I can only see the levels in hindsight, looking back.
Stop comparing yourself to others and the levels they’re currently at, because they, too, are only where they are from the previous levels in their life.
Have you ever looked back on advice from a book or a podcast or a mentor or whatever it might be and thought, “What was I thinking listening to that?”, but you’re wrong. That lesson, no matter how silly it seems in hindsight, led you to where you are now.
Although the advice seems terrible now, it’s what you needed to hear at the time, until you were ready enough to hear the next level of advice, and so on.
These stages are everywhere, because the stages are you; they're what you’re ready for.
If anything, use this as a reminder that you NEED to be wherever you are, and as long as you keep going, you’ll soon be ready to unlock the next level, and then the one after that, and so on.
Head down, aim up and keep putting the work in; the levels will happen naturally.