The Anti-Goal - Subtract Before You Add
Coffee Thoughts are short reflections on life direction, self-improvement, growth, and loosely formed general ideas that are designed to make you think. Subscribe and receive a new one every Saturday, along with a blog every Wednesday!
When it comes to positive change and personal development, we’re always told to pick who you want to become, figure out what becoming them entails, and take the corresponding action.
If we want to be healthy, we should exercise.
If we want more money, we should start a business.
If we want to reduce our stress, we should sleep more.
But for everything and every version of ourselves that we want to become, there’s equally an opposite version of them that we’re trying to avoid.
By wanting to be healthy, you’re trying to avoid being unhealthy, for example.
You don’t get one without the other, and what if instead of solely focusing on what to add to become what we want, we simultaneously concentrate our efforts on what to remove?
What are you already doing that’s causing problems?
Exercise would make you healthier, but so would cutting down your alcohol and smoking habits.
Starting a business could get you more money, but so could changing your extreme spending habits.
Sleep could make you less stressed, but so would getting away from that awful job of yours.
This isn’t to say that focusing on what you CAN do is bad, but it should never be a substitute for what you’re ALREADY doing.
Often, we’re not prevented from becoming who we want to be by what we’re not yet doing, but by what we’re already doing that’s leading us astray.
Look at what you do on a daily basis, what you do the moment you wake, who you spend time with, how much time you spend scrolling on your phone, what you eat, drink and watch, and decide whether they’re helping you get to where you want to be or doing the complete opposite.
Picture who you’d hate to be and figure out what you have in common.