2 Actionable Ways To Become More Present

I recently took a trip with my girlfriend to Prague, an amazing holiday.

However, it was during our travels home that we experienced some heavy delays.

What was meant to be a light 2 hours sat on the plane quickly turned into 5.

This was without the journey home from the airport.

But the moment I got into the bed and felt the soft sheets rub against my skin and felt as though I had reached heaven, something dawned on me. 

I realised that this was the very moment I had been visualising for the past 8 hours, and yet, being on the plane and thinking about getting into bed, only felt like it was 5 minutes ago.

About 2 minutes later, my girlfriend joined me, and I explained what I had just learned.

“You know what this journey has taught me ell? That most of our suffering is caused by our anticipation of it. All night I have been thinking about how nice this feeling would be, but why?

I’ve kept thinking, ‘How are we going to survive another X amount of hours on this plane, and then waiting for luggage, and then the bus to the car, then the gruelling drive home’. But it’s not these individual moments that cause the suffering, in fact, these individual moments were actually not bad at all. It’s our expectation of future suffering that causes all of the suffering’”

She replied “Jesus James, that’s deep, goodnight”

I chuckled and then immediately passed out. 

This was nearly a month ago now, and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since.

So What?

Most people will say “Life goes so fast".

But they were never even there to live it.

Their minds were either stuck thinking about the past or worrying about the future.

The past no longer exists, and the future is yet to exist, so if your mind is occupied with one of these two, life tends to pass you by pretty quickly.

We are all guilty of doing this, it’s how we’ve managed to survive as a species.

You could say it’s a kind of double-edged sword, it keeps us alive but causes a lot of suffering in the process.

We all know how important it is to be present, we’ve probably heard enough people tell us. I mean, people even become a Monk to try and achieve it.

Without a strong sense of presence, you’ll rid yourself of the chance to enjoy each moment. And what is life if not a very long series of moments?

But how do we do this without selling all of our belongings, leaving our families and going to live in the mountains?

Here are two actionable ways to train yourself to become more present.

Meditation

Probably the best way of becoming more present is meditation.

Meditation is training the mind to be more present, a form of mind control.

When you sit down in a quiet room and focus your attention on one thing, many random thoughts and ideas will pop into your head.

These are the opportunities to refocus your mind on the present moment, and in doing so, train the mind to do so automatically throughout your daily life.

There are many ways to meditate, but most aim to reach the same outcome, controlling the mind and becoming present.

Find one that suits you the best, and then make it a part of your daily routine.

If you wanted to become better at anything, you’d practice. So see meditation as a way of practicing being a happier, more present and mindful person.

Gratitude

The lack of gratitude you have is a direct indicator of how scattered your mind is.

If we are not focusing on what we have, then we are focusing on what we could have. A clear indicator that we lack a sense of presence.

Again, this is another flaw that comes with something that has kept us alive. If we sat around the fire a few thousand years ago feeling grateful for the deer we had eaten 2 days previous, we probably would have starved to death. For a long time, gratitude was a luxury we couldn’t afford.

But If you’re reading this blog, I’m guessing you’re not experiencing the same problem, and could most likely benefit from feeling a little more grateful.

Gratitude is not something that you either have or do not, it’s something that takes a lot of work to achieve.

When people have a near-death experience, they feel an immense sense of gratitude just to be alive, for about a week. They soon return to base levels of frustration, complaining about the potholes on the roads.

Make writing down what you’re grateful for a habit until it becomes a subconscious mode of thought. 

Just like meditation, you have to teach the brain consciously for it to become a subconscious feature.

So, there you have it, two ways to stop being stuck in the past or future, and be where your feet are.